Delivering the stories THEY don't want you to read, including:
? People who know how to fucking park on brink of extinction
? Fat kids to be chased to school by dogs
? Vatican to build huge telescope in hunt for Jesus
? Estate agents will starve to death, says upbeat report
? UK threat level raised to 'Underpants'
? Free bank with every new mobile
? Britain strikes gold in sport no one watches
? Ferguson apologises to premenstrual Reading fans
? Beckham unable to pronounce 'Scientology'
Meanwhile Agony Aunt Petula Soul tackles a diverse range of bizarre sexual problems and astrologer Psychic Bob maps your mystic future ('There's always a chance you'll get something you have been wanting for a long time. But
there's a much bigger chance you won't').
Plus: opinion polls, talking dogs and an absolutely gigantic rat.
'Makes the New Testament look like a lot of insane, voodoo rubbish'
- Rt Rev. Tom Logan, St Clive's, Taunton
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